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Pour me a Whiskey, Richard

from Raise a Toast by Ménage à Moi



Original Song
Lyrics: GMLarson
Music: J.Barry


Last Friday night, I went lookin’ for Miss Right, or looking for Miss Right-Now.
For those who weren't there my tale I will share and every word’s true this I vow.
I was feeling quite bleak at the end of the week, and went to the bar with me pay.
I walked through that door marched right across the floor, I’d look for the baran and ]say:

Pour me a Whiskey, Richard.
Just two fingers will do.
It’ll help me unwind and then in no time
I’ll chat up a woman or two, m’friend.
Chat up a woman or two.

Richard, like a pro, grabs a bottle lets it flow and he sets the glass in front of me.
The whiskey’s caramel brown so I take it, slam it down then across the bar what do I see?
As if on cue drinking’ Tullamore Dew a lass with a glint in her eye.
With a drink to calm me nerves that’ll loosen my reserves, well I think that I’ll give this a try.


She threw back her drink in barely a blink and then she threw a glance my way.
Then to my surprise she started to rise and approached like a cat stalking her prey.
She said with a grin “My name’s Elenore Lynn and you look like just what I need.
So what do you think, we finish this drink then I take you back home with me.”


We had barely left the bar and we hadn’t gone far till her hand brushed across my thigh.
All the ride home her hands started to roam, this lass with the glint in her eye.
Were barely though her door when she threw me to the floor, and she ripped off everything but my tie.
Well who would have thought I had too many shots; I couldn’t get my peter to rise.

Thanks for the whiskey, Richard.
Thanks for the whiskey dick.
I’m embarrassed to say, much to my dismay
That whiskey gave me a flaccid prick, m’friend.
That whiskey gave me a flaccid prick.

Thanks for the whiskey, Richard.
Though limp I wasn't yet done.
It wasn’t my night, but it ended all right
I finished her off with my tongue, m’friend.
I finished her off with my tongue.


from Raise a Toast, released July 1, 2019


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Ménage à Moi Chicago, Illinois

Humorously indecent. Always discreet. The top-shelf comedy stylings of Ménage À Moi pair nicely with either a cooling beer or a warming tequila shot. Come for the liberated, inclusive camaraderie. Stay for the belly laughs, new friends, and an organic unpredictability that ensures every show is unique. ... more

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